(completed November 6th, 1989)

RETIREMENT: Episode 8 - THAT'S THE TICKETTE!

Scene 1:

We are back on Janberdayx main-land, at the awards ceremony. Brundo is in a tuxedo, making his endless "I deserved to Win" speech. The crowd of listeners are becoming impatient (some are checking their manicure, other's are just on the verge of losing lunch), but missing from the crowd are Qui'Ouder, Harperia, and Rocky. The Doctor, with the 2nd place trophy, smiles and softly giggles as if to a joke that only he knows. Ace angrily shouts at him, Susan is unsure what she should be doing.

BRUNDO: "... and that's why I was destined, and truly deserved to win. How did I know, you ask?"

ACE: "Professor! Of all the $#@!$%&* things, how could you force me to loose?"

BRUNDO: "Well, there's been a steady stream of truths in my life that pointed to this. The first one that I remember, barely a week after I was born..."

Scene 2:

The three move away from the crowd en route toward the TARDIS. The Doctor is still smiling like an evangelist who's seen the accounting books, Ace is still very upset and Susan seems to be trying to make sure no one thinks she's in any way taking sides about anything.

ACE: "Professor!?!"

SUSAN: "By looking at him, one would never know that the Count was such an -- ahem -- inspired speaker."

DOCTOR: "You'll find, my dear, that he's taking his time because he knows that the hunt can go no further until the clue card is touched to the fifth item..."

SUSAN: "In other words he gloating to a captive audience until he touches his card to the trophy."

DOCTOR: "Well, Yes and No..."

Scene 3:

The three go to the TARDIS but find it blocked. Rocky's directly in front of the doors, with Qui'Ouder and Harperia in front of him to either side.

MUZZLE: "Well, Hello Doctor! Pleasant meeting you here."

DOCTOR: "Th' pleasure's mine I'm sure. If you'll excuse --"

MUZZLE: "Harperia and I have been having a little chat. It appears you've told me less than the truth..."

DOCTOR: "What ever could you mean?"

MUZZLE: "The deal was that I would get all of your items, Doctor. I'm afraid I'll have to revoke your membership card..."

SUSAN: "Can he do that Grand-Father?"

DOCTOR: "Well, Qui'Ouder, if you feel that way, I'll just have to explain to the appeals board just HOW I GOT MY MEMBERSHIP CARD..."

Scene 4:

New angle; Qui'Ouder, standing aside, has Brethed's sweat'tels around his head, while Harperia and Rocky are now looking at him, with suspicious looks verging on anger.

MUZZLE: "Aw, heck. Come to think of it, there's no rule against tricking your competitors. I guess we might as well let the good ol' Doc go."

HARPO: Qui'Ouder must have broken the rules when issuing the Doctor's membership card!

ROCKY: "No so. Harperia think she turn both in for break rules. 2 less competitors."

Scene 5:

New angle (again), as the Doctor pulls out a pamphlet from his hind pocket and holds it before Harperia.

DOCTOR: "Odd you should mention that. While at the tourney, I had plenty of time to read up on the rules. Did you know that if the membership manager is under suspicion of membership fraud, all current Scavanger Hunts must be abandoned and none may start until a full membership review takes place."

ROCKY: "What U get @?"

DOCTOR: "Well it seems to me, that such a review could take quite some time. Now my companions and myself have other source of income... But for those who make a living from hunt proceeds HARPERIA..."

MUZZLE: "Now that he mentions it..."

DOCTOR: "The choice is up to you."

Scene 6:

The Doctor is entering the TARDIS interior followed by Ace and Susan.

DOCTOR: "Politics! I love it. Why it reminded me of some skirmishes I had with Ben Franklin --"

ACE: "Professor! Stop trying to avoid the subject."

Scene 7:

New angle with the Doctor touching the card to the tickette with Ace and Susan to either side.

ACE: "What, in your daft head, caused you to make me lose the..."

SUSAN: "It's changing!"

DOCTOR: "'Let's have a big British hand for the end of the Scavanger hunt'. Humph, that's simple!"

Scene 8:

Ace stands dumb-founded as the Doctor hands her the 'Tickette'. Susan has a knowing smile on her face.

DOCTOR: "Ace, could you put this with the others?"

SUSAN: "You knew what you were doing all along."

DOCTOR: "Well, as it turns out, not only did I have time to read the rules book. I also spent a little time rethinking the last clue..."

Scene 9:

The Doctor is setting the controls while Susan is listening and Ace is in the back-ground placing the tickette on the prize shelf.

DOCTOR: "Upon seeing that second prize was a clock in the shape of a woman: 'Tick-ette'. I realized that `Back in Place' must mean second place."

SUSAN: "Hence why you made Ace lose the game at the last minute."

Scene 10:

Ace is now by the Doctor.

ACE: "I'm sorry for screaming at you professor."

DOCTOR: "Nonsense! You had every right. I just wish I could have told you sooner."

DOCTOR: "By the way, has anyone else figured out the new clue yet?"

Scene 11:

Ace and Susan think the clue over.

SUSAN: "Well, British would obviously indicate that the next item's somewhere in Britain."

ACE: "Maybe some abstract artist made a sculpture of a huge hand?"

DOCTOR: "No, no, wrong hand. What do you think of when you hear `Let's have a big hand..'?"

ACE: "Applause, Clapping..."

DOCTOR: "And who does the clapping?"

SUSAN: "An audience? You mean we have to get the biggest audience in Britain?"

Scene 12:

New angle.

DOCTOR: "Fat chance of that. Think singular."

ACE & SUSAN: "Huh?"

DOCTOR: "Let me think... Alright. Suppose You're in a restaurant and you want someone to wait on you, you get a waiter."

DOCTOR: "Now suppose you wanted some one to clap for you?"

SUSAN: "You'd get a Clapper?"

ACE: "You mean we've got to get the biggest clapper in Britain? Who's that?"

Scene 13:

"Back on Janberdayx 5..." Brundo's still speaking but is disturbed when he hears murmuring in the crowd.

BRUNDO: "... and that indication naturally tied in when I was two years old..."

HECKLER: (whispering) "He must mean last week. <snicker!>"

MUMBLER: "Hey! My clue card's already changed!"

Scene 14:

Scene of Brundo's shocked face as he quickly looks at his card in horror.

BRUNDO: "No! How?"

MUMBLER: "Has anyone seen where the Doctor went too?"

Scene 15:

Brundo, we see his face tight with pure hatred as the fingers of his right hand squeeze in on the face of the baby on the Swine-Brau trophy, causing indentations (one in one of the baby's eyes...).

BRUNDO: "Doctor... DOCTOR!"

Scene 16:

"London, England: 2213." Scene of the TARDIS materializing in front of Parliament (don't forget this is over 150 years in the future!). By the way, it's night time...

ACE: (from TARDIS) "I feel stupid wearing this!"

DOCTOR: (from TARDIS) "Now Ace. We'll need to look inconspicuous if we're going to make off with..."

Scene 17:

Scene looking up at Big Ben from the ground.

DOCTOR: (from off-frame) "... The Clapper of Big Ben!"

Scene 18:

The Doctor, dressed in the costume of a guard for the Tower of London, exits the TARDIS with Ace and Susan dressed as Royal Palace guards.

DOCTOR: "Since everything's closed this time of night, we should be able to sneak-up to the top without being seen."

SUSAN: "What about the night guards?"

DOCTOR: "If we meet up with any guards, we shouldn't be questioned since we're wearing the proper guard uniforms."

Scene 19:

Scene of the three-some somewhere in the Parliament building.

SUSAN: "Grand-father, you realize it's against the law to steal?"

DOCTOR: "The way I see it, I deserve the chance to barrow it for a bit. After all the work I did for U.N.I.T... Unpaid!"

ACE: "U.N.I.T.? What's that?"

DOCTOR: "Never you mind. Besides, with the TARDIS I can have it returned before the end of the hour."

Scene 20:

Another room of Parliament.

ACE: "Are you sure we're going the right way?"

DOCTOR: "Of course! Why I was the best dead-reckoner in class."

SUSAN: "Weren't you the only one who took that class?"

Scene 21:

Scene of them climbing up many stairs.

DOCTOR: "Ah! This must be the way!"

SUSAN: "It's kind of odd that we've seen no guards at all."

ACE: "Maybe they don't think Big Ben's all that valuable."

Scene 22:

The three are in the bell chamber.

SUSAN: "Are you kidding? Big Ben was the first thing restored once we'd gotten rid of the Daleks!"

DOCTOR: "Many Londoners are very protective of their over-sized alarm-clock!"

Scene 23:

Scene of the Doctor seeing that the clapper is missing.

DOCTOR: "Good Heavens. It's already gone!"

ACE: "Professor! There's a plaque over here which says the clapper was mysteriously stolen in 1990!"

Scene 24:

The three discussing the situation.

SUSAN: "That's not possible, it was working when I was here fifty years ago!"

DOCTOR: "Unless... Yes, that would explain it."

ACE: "What are you talking about?"

Scene 25:

The three discussing the situation, still.

DOCTOR: "Susan was protected by the time realignment by being in the TARDIS..."

SUSAN: "Realignment?"

Scene 26:

Tight on Doctor (boy, we're starting to get like the Colin Baker years...).

DOCTOR: "Some Scavanger has gone back in time and radically changed the course of history, simply to win the Hunt!"

NEXT EPISODE: TOMORROW'S PAST.